Phone booth/Parking meter

Another sample of why I love having lunch with Irene & how Irene enriches my life.

In some areas, instead of parking meters, they have self-serve  parking kiosks. Deposit coins, key in car licence plate number, place resulting ticket on windshield area for parking maids to verify.

Renu gleefully told me about the time Irene tried to get a parking ticket by inserting coins into a PUBLIC PHONE. The receiver was still on its rest, so the coins just kept shooting out into the receptacle. She turned to Renu to ask why this new machine wasn't working.

Renu laughed her head off, then proceeded to take picture of said phone kiosk for the "show" portion of show & tell. Irene's unsure if Renu knew it was a public phone and kept quiet just for comedic effect, or whether Renu herself didn't realise it was a phone booth till Irene asked her if it wasn't working.

Me? I'm still laughing. :D

Please don't hold meetings in my pantry

Had a meeting in the Main Conference Room at 11am.
At noon, tea lady drops in to ask if we're going to finish soon cos the boss is going to have lunch.
Yes. We had to stop the meeting.
So boss could eat in the meeting room.
Yes, the meeting in progress involved people fr outside my company.
Yes, they heard her.
No, they couldn't believe their ears.

Cooking School for Accountants

The School of Culinary Arts is parked under the Faculty of Business, Economics and Accounting.
I don't know why.

My boss: Cos they're teaching them how to cook the books.

OMFG that was BRILL!! And before 10am!
I never knew he was so witty.

Daya ada. Mutu lain kira.

I couldn't reach Rama on the phone.
Called Daya to ask her for alt number. Daya's with HR, so Daya pulled out his staff file. No alt number.Whatever.
Got add from Daya. Great.
Thank you Daya.

Daya: You couldn't reach him?
Me: nope. Got a recorded msg fr telco. Number not in use.
Me: never mind. Worse to worse, will go to his house.


10 mins later, phone rings. It's Daya.

Daya: Lyn - the phone rang. So it works.
Me: Did you wait past 4 rings? The msg only kicks in after 4 rings.
Daya: Nope. Heard the ring tone, hung up, called you.
Me: So let me get this straight... You know I'm looking for Rama. You know I haven't been able to get through to his phone. You dialled, you got a ringing tone, but instead of talking to Rama & telling him to call me, you hung up & dialled MY number to tell me that the bloody phone number works? So I could continue to call him with or without luck?
Daya: errr ..... yes.

OH MY FUCKING GOD.

...

Clement came by for small change.
Clement: For toll.
Me: Don't you have Smart Tag?
Clement: Nope. Don't use it much. I have Touch n Go instead.
Me: Then why don't you use Touch n Go?
Clement: It's backup in case I don't have cash.
Me: ....

So he's constantly queuing for the cash lane, when he has a perfectly working Touch n Go card.
Whatever.

Lasik is like Golf...

You swing... and sometimes, you have to putt it in.

Pearls of Wisdom courtesy of Norman.

Dell 7n557

.Am writing this entry on a Dell 7n557 tablet PC. It isn't half bad really. The handwriting recognition software is rather intelligent & can interpret most of my usually illegible squiggles. However, I think the predictive text only works in English. Bahasa Malaysia, for example, doesn't stand a chance in neraka ofbeing spelt right the first time." Wo ai ni," needed to be written 4 times before it was correct -either due to the program trying to auto-correct the damn words or misinterpreting what I was_Xwriting in the first place.

That having been said. I haven't discovered much else. Been too busy playing with the handwriting function! Haha. More later I guess.

Ummmm....

What do you do when you open your boss' notebook and the header reads: Audio Visual Issues at Clinique?
a) Automatically transcribe minutes to read the correct word: Clinic.
b) Marvel at how in touch he is with his feminine side
c) Tsk at how he has never been able to tell the difference and really, you should know better than to be suprised by now...
d) All of the above.

Sometimes ah...

How can a man who knows so little, have so much to say??
SIGH

Random Thought...

Irene & Renu are like an old married couple with men on the side...

Please get ready...

Just a sample of why I love Irene, having lunch with Irene, and how Irene enriches my life. Renu, is subject for another story.

Irene:
I was in the bathroom near the pantry today when I saw a small, tiny, li'll cockroach wriggling on the floor. It looked like it was suffering. Like it was half dead. It was crawling across the floor painfully & difficultly.

Renu:
So you killed it?

Irene:
I put LOTS of tissue paper over it. Then I said a little prayer for it. Then I told it, "I'm going to put you out of your misery. Please get ready... I hope you reincarnate soon." Then I stepped on it.

Renu asked if Irene had flushed it after, but that was a dumb question. Irene would NEVER touch it. There isn't enough Dettol in the world.

Houston, we have problemces...

Head of Department, in a presentation during a Strategy Retreat:

"... we have to take action to rectify all our department problemces."

'nuff said.

------

Edit:
Actually, I might have misquoted him. I really didn't register ANY other part of the sentence except that last word.

Cost Rationalisation

Email fr my president:

Cost rationalisation is about cutting wasteful expenses or unwarranted expenses.
It's about spending wisely.
It's about cutting "bad costs' (a management term).
It does not mean we do not spend when we need to invest in growth and quality.

We need hand towels.
Cleanliness is godliness.

Thank you

-----
Reading between the lines, me thinks his bathroom has run out of paper towels.
Rest assured, Pres.
I've informed the cleaners.

Re: Application for vacation

To whom it may concern,

We received your application re: above.
We regret to inform you that you have not been selected for the interview process at this time.
This is due to you apparently applying for a Vacation, as opposed to (I'm guessing) a VACANCY(?) & due to the fact that I refuse to hereafter address you as "SAVAN The Great".

Thank you, and have a good day.

Regards,
Me.

--------
From: SAVAN The Great [mailto:emailadd@hotmail.com]
Sent: Sunday, 17 May, 2009 6:31 PM
Subject: application for vacation

**Actual names and addresses have been altered to protect the intellectually challenged.

My Engrand very powderful

Me:
I've been practicing my engrand.
Since my HR manager kindly reminded me that my boss still hasn't written email saying I dun need to go for engrand crass.
I figure since that trainer punya gaji so high, may as well get my money's worth.

Girlfriend:
hhahahhahahah
why do u hv to go for engrand crasses again??

Me:
cos my boss say he whole department need to go for engrand crass to improve the speaking skill.
so they can be more confiden when they speaking to others people
and when they speaking the others people can easy to understand clearer

Girlfriend:
lmao

Me:
summore hoh, HR Manager say the staffs must can submit emails they usually type one.
so the trainer can see what level they can do ah.
then trainer can seperates them one into the different category to training them same levels one.
easier ah.
so I must learning to type like this also.
so she can be see the levels I can do ah.
and be to put me into the correct place loh so I can be learning propery.

Sometimes, the Company *so* ROCKS

The company I work for sometimes surprises me. In a good way.

The price of rice had increased by RM10/kg early this year.
The price of cooking oil (I know not why) had also increased early this year.
Gas prices were raised by a huge amt recently.
Consequently, the price of *everything* has gone up yet again.

What does the Company do?
Award each staff with a living allowance on top of salary.
Uh huh. These guys have *do* a heart after all.

Sure, the quantum is tied up with what level of education you have, which is a bit head-scratching for me seeing as it's the people who are paid the least that will need this allowance the most... but we're talking about raising salaries across the board by a couple of hundred Ringgit a month, over & above salary reviews.

Company, you ROCK.